Wednesday 1 August 2012

Love Marriage or Arranged Marriage

                                                      Love Marriage or Arranged Marriage

Marriage ... A rituals to live with your life partner,love,better half and your soul mate..These terms are often we get in dictionary and on net ... But the thing is how to find it in real life ??? By doing Love marriage or Arranged marriage ?? This topic is just so perfect for debate and surely can cross the time siren too ... In this case experience matters most I guess ... Experienced one can give the proper ray of light into this matter.. Whether it is love marriage or arranged one ...So here I am going to portrait on my point of view.

The  features of  both the marriages are stated below....

Love marriage :  1) Bride and Groom doesn't have any expectations from each other before marriage 
                               as they see each other for long time or a very long time.
                           2) Bride -Groom plan everything then both parents meet .. That's the time for high 
                                peak of  tension

                           3) No scene to compromise from both sides as they know each other well and use to     
                              be in love from before and  then plan to marry.

                          4) Parental demands are not to be given much importance.

Arranged marriage :  1) Bride and Groom both have huge expected criterias about their better    
                                       half before marriage..such as he/she must be like this,must have this or that 
                                       habit and blah blah blah !!!

                                  2)Families and parents plan everything first and then bride and groom meet 
                                     with some huge formalities.
                                  3)Compromise and Adjustments are the main two keys in arranged marriage.

                                  4)Family demands play a pivotal role in arranged marriage..

This was just a rough sketch of the scenario which we see actually,basically I feel.But I think any relationship must have few responsibilities and so in marriages also ... The topic is love marriage or arranged marriage ... But both the marriages can be successful if both partners value each other's emotions,morals and respect their particulars..Understanding is the primary key to this relationship..and the secondary one is compromising.. Both the persons need to compromise...with one hand clap does not sound well .. 

What I feel personally is ... When you love someone and plan to marry with that person,expectations,hopes and wishes touch the sky ..  gradually  it gets more  .. and practically post- marriage responsibilities are really more than pre-marriage responsibilities..If any partner fails to understand that then misunderstandings arise..and changes into dark clouds..and then rains..Girls always like to have attention care from their husband,if love marriage then definitely more.. but Guys who fails to understand this and fails to give the same to their partner..misunderstanding comes..Guys on the other hand want liberty and space ... when girlfriends turned  wives ask for some attention,guys get themselves loosing the space and all liberty... and thus we can see some un successful love marriages...But it really doesn't mean that love marriages do not do well..They do of course.. People who adjusts with the situations and cope up with all the difficulties they do prove that love marriages do success..

On the other hand when to say about arranged marriages ... the concept is quite strange to live with someone for whole life who you don't even know and the pre marriage rituals whether from meeting the alliance to few match mixing game ...really kind of  formal and awkward too from few point of view. ... But .. practically arranged marriages do get more successful than love marriages..I have read once that in one recent survey it has been seen that arranged marriages are more successful than love marriages..means less divorce prone. But obviously not with any mismatch....In arranged marriage both the people get to know each other gradually.. Here family plays very important role .... And Love ?? obviously love happens in arranged marriage... but after marriage... In India arranged marriages are one kind of tradition though now changing a bit..But we all have seen our parents,relatives and our ancestors too to have lived happily  in arranged marriage... Yes arranged marriage do take time for both to know and to get comfortable with..But love happens... As there are no need to be any kind of Love related expectations and wishes ... when any one does so...other feels overwhelmed...and that's how love grows ... 

So in short....

Love marriage ----  Love and then marriage..
Arranged marriage ---- Marriage and then love..
about success in marriage ...understanding,compromising,adjusting and at last but not the least Love Care and Luck matter most...

                                                                                                                            © Debarati Datta


  1. nice post :) all the best!!

    have a look at this one too when you get time and do promoteit on indiblogger if you like it :)

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